On Patience
Rhiannon Tibbetts
I. Introduction
A. Good Morning! Most of you know that my name is Rhiannah Tibbetts. I’ve been a member here at First Baptist Church for six years, but I’ve been hanging around here for about ten years, now. I’ve grown to love this Church during my time here.
B. And, as a trans woman, I’ve been overwhelmed with the level of acceptance and support that I have experienced here.
C. I haven’t been feeling too well lately (I’m wearing a portable heart monitor), so I hope that you will be patient with me this morning
D. Oh, and the subject of this sermon happens to be patience.
II. So, What About Patience?
A. Why is it important?
1. We live in a very frenetic, frazzled, me-first world
2. We need our fast food fast, our convenience stores now, our text messages quickly and our personal info & news in short sound bites
3. But, is that really healthy for us? Does that lifestyle feed us spiritually and emotionally?
4. I know that some people that have been patient with me over the years have been a very healing influence in my own life
5. I believe that exhibiting patience is an important gateway to a healthier, happier, more peaceful world
B. It’s been said that:
1. Being in a hurry is the essence of rudeness (that’s according to Eastern thought)
a. Being in a hurry could also be termed as being impatient
b. When this is taken to an extreme we see dangerous behavior such as road-rage
2. It’s said that patience is a virtue
3. That it’s one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit
4. We know that God is slow to anger
5. We’ve heard that Jesus conducted his ministry on his own, ideal timetable
6. And, we’ve read that Job is a prime example of patience in the Bible
a. Job lost everything he had, including his health and he was persecuted by his friends
b. Despite his desperate state, he didn’t act out irrationally or violently
c. Job displayed great patience, but he really didn’t take this affliction passively either
d. He took verbal exception with his persecutors and he took his concerns to God, as well
e. Patience doesn’t give others the right to walk all over us
f. Eventually, God restored Job to his good graces
g. Job learned and grew quite a bit as a result of this experience
h. He understood, in greater depth, the importance of patience and he learned the meaning of gratefulness
7. It’s safe to say that God really values patience
C. So, what to do about patience?
1. Many people think of patience as being a product of our genetics, our temperament and our personal experiences
2. While nature has great importance and general validity here as a source of patience, I want to assert to you, today, that patience can also be a product of our own concerted efforts to develop it
3. I have been fortunate enough to have benefited from the great patience of several people in my life
4. These experiences have been very healing as well as informative for me
5. I believe that there are at least four avenues that can move us towards developing greater patience:
a. Christian Meditation
b. Relying on our trust and faith
c. Developing empathy and understanding
d. Being self-forgetful
III. Christian Meditation
A. I began meditating back in about 2007 while finishing my degree here at the University
B. I started in with this discipline at the suggestion of a good friend of mine
C. He gave me a book called: Full Catastrophe Living by Jon Kabat-Zinn
D. Kabat-Zinn’s particular style of meditating is known as: Mindfulness Based Stress-Reduction
1. I quickly noticed an improvement in my concentration capacities and my level of serenity after a few weeks of meditating
E. A few years later I was introduced to Christian meditation by another close friend of mine
1. I read a book aptly titled: Christian Meditation by James Finley
2. This form of the discipline allows for the mental space and calm created by meditation to be filled with God’s love
3. It is a very intimate way of relating to God
4. I come up to the Church regularly to pray and meditate alone in the sanctuary
5. I find the immense holy silence there to be very healing
6. I have wept there, often
F. I have found that this practice lowers a person’s emotional center of gravity and it is helpful in staying grounded
G. I believe that patience is often a natural outgrowth of this increase in emotional calm and serenity
IV. Trust and Faith (second route)
A. Remember that God really does have our back-And he won’t just drop us
B. If we keep that in mind, we can minister to others with confidence and patience
C. A recent experience at IHOP:
We went to have lunch at a local restaurant. We were waited on and then we sat and chatted. We waited for quite some time before the waitress returned to tell us that our food would be coming soon. So we waited and we waited. Finally the waitress returned to let us know that our order slip had been lost and that our dinner would be discounted.
D. Our faith made a positive impression on the staff there that day
E. I believe that thoughtful actions can have a positive ripple effect and are also their own reward
V. Empathy and Understanding
A. My experience at a pizza delivery restaurant
I was a delivery driver at a pizza restaurant on the north side of Madison about thirty years ago. This restaurant was located near a state mental hospital. We would regularly get phone orders from this hospital from patients. Whenever we would get these calls most of the staff seemed more interested in running the other direction rather than take these orders. Probably because these patients were often a bit disorganized, spacy and discourteous. But I would take the orders patiently and courteously. My boss would always look at me in amazement after those calls and couldn’t understood how I did it.
B. I think that my own personal background with mental health issues explains a lot of my patience. Having struggled with my own mental health issues and having had friendships with folks with serious mental illness, I have some insight into and natural empathy for other folks with these struggles. And empathy and understanding often give birth to patience.
VI. Self-forgetfulness (Fourth avenue to developing patience)
A. I want to tell you about some healing that I’ve experienced through one of my special friendships
1. I met my friend, Angela, at a Social Work Christian Fellowship group on campus in February of 2010
2. Her sense of faith, hope and love became exemplary to me
B. She would regularly set aside her our own needs and ego out of a sense of Christian love (for me and for others too)
C. She gave me her undivided attention when we were together
1. I felt very comfortable with her
2. And we never spoke any harsh words to each otherr
D. She only canceled one activity out of hundreds- that was when she had a concussion while skiing
E. Incredibly thoughtful and polite-examples
F. She was always flexible with me when I was troubled-movie example
G. But similar to Job, she was strong and wouldn’t be walked all over-she could be assertive and she was also quite competitive
H. She has gone on to become a social worker and she moved to Colorado a few years ago
I. I still miss seeing her a whole lot
J. She has been a major healing force in my life, I felt valuable when I was around her
K. She is the most patient and laid-back, but yet warm, woman that I have ever known
L. Angela also inspired and challenged me to do things like my writing, for instance
VII, Conclusion
A. I encourage you to be patient for your own sake but also to help build a healthier community
B. But, consider being patient with yourself too- Out of a sense of love
1. When you love yourself, this love is communicated to others, the Bible tells us: (“Love thy neighbor as thyself”)
2. So there is an important, natural relationship there
C. I hope that you will consider employing some of these methods that I have mentioned, today, for improving patience
D. These avenues, again, are: Christian Meditation, leaning on your faith and trust, developing your empathy and understanding capacities and practicing self-forgetfulness
E. So, why not give some of these practices a try?
1. I think that you will find them to be self-reinforcing
2. And that it will get easier over time, like exercising a muscle
So, Thanks for your patience!
My name is Rhiannon Tibbetts. I am a Christian/transgender woman who gave the above sermon in an American Baptist Church a couple of years ago. I am currently a deacon at that church.
Rhiannon's Beautiful Gift 